Today’s Word: Obliviots
August 23rd, 2006 . by Caryo-bli-vee-uts: n., persons who are oblivious to their surroundings, and oblivious to the fact they are oblivious; usually accompanied by sense of being the center, and sole occupant, of the entire universe. Very similar to Darwin Award Candidate.
I was at the first major intersection I traverse on my commute this morning, headed south, waiting for the light to change. The north and south turn lanes got their arrow, and the cars in those lanes moved out, in a surprisingly organized manner (considering I am in Phoenix, Arizona). At this point, the obliviot makes her appearance. She started crossing the street from east to west on the south side of the intersection.
The lights turned green for the north-south traffic. Since there was an obstruction, the northbound cars did not move. The southbound lanes (remember, we are in Phoenix, where nothing stops the green light drag race) took off like a shot, crossing the five lanes on the crossroad. Obliviot suddenly stopped walking, in the northbound turn lane, because she sensed impending doom.
Having started her illegal foray across the street, she stood in the crosswalk at the turn lane (I will give her credit for using the crosswalk) watching in amazement as the southbound drivers flew past her. Obviously, we were supposed to stop, and allow her to finish crossing unimpeded. None of us did. I watched in the rear view mirror as she waited for the last of the southbound traffic to clear, and she sprinted across the remaining lanes, only to start sprinting across the eastbound lanes, crossing the street to the north, just as the east/west traffic got their green lights. At that point, I was too far down the street to be able to pick her out in the mirror without loosing concentration on my task at hand; that is, driving in Phoenix.
I do not know if she survived her street crossing foray, but she needs to learn that the people here do not stop for random street crossers like they do in her country of origin. At least, I am assuming they do that in her country of origin; otherwise why would she cross like that? It’s not a natural action, that’s for sure – very much against the whole “survival” circuit that kicks on in the brain. Well, for some people it does.
God bless you all, please drive safely, and look both ways before crossing the street when you have the appropriate clearance/light/walk sign.
She would have caused me to drop my eyeliner in the floor board!!! How dare she!!!
Joking! LOL.
My favorite ppl are those who have the right away and sit and stare at you while you wait for them to cross just so you can make your turn. Then as they pass by you, they give you the one finger salute like you are the idiot! LOL.
Maybe it was an illegal immigrant of the female variety in a extreme hurry trying to find the nearest church to seek refuge in…Did you happen to see any border patrol in the area also?
Sounds like she’s an excellent candidate for the gene pool improvement program.
Eby – those are some of my favorites, too. Especially the ones using the International Translator on their finger becasue they can’t speak English…
Gunz, that’s very perceptive of you. I didn’t once mention the perceived nationality or legality of said crosser, yet you were able to piece the clues together…
JJ, one can only hope…
GREEN LIGHT!… RED LIGHT!… GREEN LIGHT!… RED LIGHT!… SPLAT!!!
Hey she’d fit right in here in Mexifornia. Not only do the illegals cross the street like that, but we’ve got the gang bangers who think they own the world, the transient shopping cart pushers, the rowdy kids who think they are cool, and the mental cases who talk to themselves the whole time they are crossing against the light!!
Sometimes I’d give anything for a big ass truck with a huge cattle guard on the front! *grins*
And yet, if you do bounce one off your grill, YOU get the ticket! Go figure…
Sues-That sounds like my job!!! Oh wait…
Obliviot def. 1 n. George W. Bush, current occupant of White House.
Sorry Cary, couldn’t resist 🙂
Ebyjo – that’s every teacher’s job description.
Rick – you are entitled to your opinion. While he’s not doing the best job possible, in my opinion, he’s still doing a better job than the alternative would have been doing…