Wearin’ the Patriot today.

We had dinner at Golden Corral last night. While going up to get more steak, I spotted a gentleman wearing a VietNam Veteran ball cap, with his ribbons sewn on. I stopped, thanked him for his service, and said “Welcome Home.” He thanked me for the sentiments, and said a lot of people just aren’t aware of what the average Vet has gone through. I told him I made a point of thanking the Vets I spotted, because too many of them hadn’t been thanked by anyone, and almost none of them were told “Welcome Home” by anyone outside their family. His wife sobbed loudly at that point, and he could just nod and turn away.

Have you thanked a Vet lately?

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!

Well, my cousin didn’t come through with any funnies this week, so I will end the week with the request that you click the logo above, and buy a red shirt to wear on Fridays. I have my “Rolling Thunder” on, and feel rather sporty…

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!

My cousin, the one who sent me last Friday’s funny, sent me this one this week:

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What? Too many shakes?

UPS – 1, FedEx – 0

Just one – that’s all I ask – just let me touch one of them…

Hmmm, let’s try spelling first, and then move on to more complicated subjects…

I think it was the FedEx driver:

This wouldn’t happen to be by the school that teaches Arithetic, would it?

Sometimes, a name change would be a good idea…

Hey, take me to the cleaners!

Don’t rush me – this is a very important decision…

Turns out I can’t there from here, anyway.

Little known fact: CMT’s new series, My Redneck Wedding, was inspired by this sign:

Oh, the Joys! Oh, the Blessings! Oh, the College Tuition!

Uhm, logic check, lane one …

Actually, kind of a relief, wouldn’t you say?

Take two languages, both with idiosyncrasies, idioms, and a tricky sentence structure, and mix goodly:

The cow jumped over the what?

Hay, Martha! Feed ’em some burritos, and let’s go!

I think I know what happened to Mr. FedEx here…

Oh, the shame of not knowing how to react…

I – I – I just don’t know what to say here…

Grass? What grass? Oh, I get it – it’s one of those preachy, “artsy-fartsy” anti-drug messages, man…

Now, I don’t feel so bad for failing physics…

Now hiring for what? Short term employment?

Don’t drink and make road signs, you mean…

It must have been the FedEx driver!

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Have a safe weekend, and come back soon!

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!

I am looking very stylin’ in my “Patriot” shirt today.

With a few errands to run while TMBWitW is enjoying her vacation time, I came home to this e-mail from my cousin:

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“I ran over my brother because the voices told me to.”

Pick the month you were born:

January——-I kicked
February——I loved
March———I karate chopped
April———I licked
May———–I jumped on
June———-I smelled
July———-I did the Macarena with
August——–I had lunch with
September—–I danced with
October——-I sang to
November——I yelled at
December——I ran over

Pick the day (number) you were born on:
01——-a birdbath
02——-a monster
03——-a phone
04——-a fork
05——-a snowman
06——-a gangster
07——-my mobile phone
08——-my dog
09——-my best friends’ boyfriend
10——-my neighbor
11——-my science teacher
12——-a banana
13——-a fireman
14——-a stuffed animal
15——-a goat
16——-a pickle
17——-your mom
18——-a spoon
19——-a smurf
20——-a baseball bat
21——-a ninja
22——-Chuck Norris
23——-a noodle
24——-a squirrel
25——-a football player
26——-my sister
27——-my brother
28——-an iPod
29——-a surfer
30——-a llama
31——-A homeless guy

Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:

White———because I’m cool like that
Black———because that’s how I roll.
Pink———-because I’m NOT crazy.
Red———–because the voices told me to.
Blue———-because I’m sexy and I do what I want
Green———because I think I need some serious help.
Purple——–because I’m AWESOME!
Gray———-because Big Bird said to and he’s my leader.
Yellow——–because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
Orange——–because my family thinks I’m stupid anyway.
Brown———because I can.
Other———because I’m a Ninja!
None———-because I can’t control myself!

Now type out the sentence you ended up with. Leave it here in a comment for me, and/or send it on to everyone you wish to annoy.

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Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!

You know what to do.

Don’t let the liberals talk you out of it!

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!